clientsfromhell:

the gift that keeps on giving.

clientsfromhell:

the gift that keeps on giving.

294 notes

clientsfromhell:

Email correspondence with an older client:

Client: “JUST SEND THE MOCKUPS TO JOLENE AND I WILL LOOK AT THEM WHEN I GET BACK NEXT TUESDAY.”

Me: “Sure thing. Is everything OK over there? You seem like you’re yelling everything!”

Client: “THESE DAMN PUERTO RICAN COMPUTERS. EVERYTHING IS IN BIG…

902 notes

clientsfromhell:

My friend’s flatmate was working for a big advertising agency on a sponsored working visa. Apparently if he lost his job, he couldn’t stay in the country. One day he was called into the Creative Directors office and told to stand by the window and look at a particular window of the building…

400 notes

The website you made is infected with a virus! Every time I go to check my mail after visiting the site, I get all kinds of porn! I tried going to hotmale.com on my daughter’s computer too and the problem persisted.

814 notes

clientsfromhell:

On more than one occasion, my art director stood over my shoulder and said, “Eww! What the hell are those light blue lines?”

The only solution is to turn off the Photoshop Guides. He always remarks it makes the image “much better.”

202 notes

HELP! I can’t send or receive email.
Sent via email.  (via clientsfromhell)

439 notes

The smartest men in America can be poor clients as well

clientsfromhell:

See if you can figure out what they’re talking about before you reach the bottom

Client 1: “I’m simply not comfortable with those letters, something is missing.”

Client 2: “Well, yes, the cross stroke is gone from the letter A.”

Client 1: “Yes, and that bothers me.”

Client 2: “Why?”

Client 1: (long pause) “I just don’t feel we are getting our money’s worth!”

The logo being discussed:  

Two NASA logos, one known as

Source

356 notes

I got this email once from some lawyer in Nigeria and when I opened it and clicked the link, the same email was sent it to everyone in my contact list. I thought, hey, this is a pretty smart and simple marketing technique. When I send out this email to the 4,000 people, I want it to automatically forward to everyone in their contact list. Can you have this done for me by tomorrow?

383 notes

clientsfromhell:

A client wanted some special “retouching” on some of his photographs. The actual request, unedited:

Hi,

I want you to modify a photography (more later if i’m please with your work) who contain a dressed woman and i want you to male her naked, then put her in a explicit position, making sex…

264 notes

clientsfromhell:

Me: Hi, I’m just updating the copy for your form and was wondering if you meant to say ‘programs’ for the third question?

Client: NO. What I sent along was completely accurate, I wrote and edited it myself. Just copy it over exactly as it says, I’ll explain it nice and slowly for you. 

Me: ‘Please indicate which pogroms you’ve attended?’

Client: Yeah, that should be programs. 

584 notes

clientsfromhell:

A client hadn’t replied to my latest proof. I asked if he’d seen it yet, to which he replied: 

"There are too many words. I don’t like to read that much (nor do I have the time), and frankly, I don’t think other people do either"

There were literally seven words on the proof.  

200 notes

hey got you’re message, try using spelcheck next time and check you’re grammer okay bud?

439 notes

clientsfromhell:

My boss is having a website designed and wants to deal with the website designers himself, despite having little understanding of modern technology, most of which I’ve taught him.

Earlier he said “The designers have emailed me asking whether I wanted emails on my website. You recommended these…

131 notes

clientsfromhell:

Client: (Calling our computer store for assistance) “I turn on my computer, but all I can see is the green LED on! The screen is still black!”

Me: “Your computer is here. You have only the monitor”.

517 notes

clientsfromhell:

Client: It says my username and password don’t match.

Me: Ok. Is the caps lock on?

Client: No.

Me: Are you sure? Because the password has to be in all lower case letters in order for it to work.

Client: I’m not stupid. The caps lock is not on. Just tell me how to fix my computer.

Me: Ok. Look right above the number pad on your keyboard. Are any of those lights lit?

Client: Yes, all of them, but that has nothing to do with the problem.

625 notes